Love

Well...surely you have to write about love on Valentine's Day?! 

This morning in church I did a little sketch about love, sitting sadly in my chair because I hadn't got a Valentine's card which surely meant no-one loved me. The kids gathered round, eager to put their hands up and tell me all the other ways I could know I was loved. It was quite sweet :-) 

Popping into Tesco's on the way home there was a brisk parade of flower buying and in the car park a fair amount of last minute card writing happening! It got me thinking that it is rather a long time since I wrote or received a Valentines card, so much so that it's kind of gone off my radar as something people do, and maybe that's not a good thing. There are quite a few people in my life that I love and I'm not always that good at telling them so, perhaps it's time to get better at it!

Love, as the kids reminded me, is a lot about the things we do for each other, but it is good to put words to our deeds too. 

Frustration

One of the joys of living in college is engaging with the network printer... I've spent many (not-so-happy) hours over the last three years walking down the corridor from my room to the printer only to find nothing has printed or the paper has jammed or...well you can guess all the possible outcomes! Tonight has seen a 45 minute attempt to print the service for tomorrow morning, an exercise of patience and not a little frustration.

Frustration is an interesting emotion, perhaps it is a good one because at least there was hope in the beginning that all would go smoothly. I wonder if you live without hope whether you do get frustrated or whether you just have no expectation that things will go well for you?

The psalms are a good place for learning how all sorts of different emotions can be expressed to God within an attitude of worship. Psalm 10 starts with questions: Why, O Lord, do you stand far away? Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble? There is never an easy answer to the supposed absence of God when things go wrong, but the psalmist ends by saying "O Lord, you hear the desire of the afflicted; you will strengthen their heart." This is what gives hope - there is one who hears and gives strength to those who call on Him.

And I did get my print in the end too!

Gratitude

It was interesting over Christmas listening to the debate about whether a forced thank-you letter is better or worse than an impromptu thank-you text. Much as I love to receive and send cards and letters, there is something powerful about genuine gratitude. 

In Luke 6.45, Jesus is in the middle of saying some pretty amazing things when he says: "Out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks". Sometimes it's hard to be thankful, other times it's easy, but I know if I keep noticing the little things I'm grateful for then they get stored up and it's words of gratitude that I hear myself speak. 

I've so much to be thankful for I don't ever want to take that for granted.

Perspective

One thing I like about living in Cheltenham is that it doesn't take long to get up high on the hills surrounding the town. It was such a glorious day today that I took a short walk up the hill from my house, and this was my view 15 minutes later. A much needed change of view from all my studying!


Changing our perspective is a healthy thing to do especially if we are feeling stuck in a rut, or if life is not going the way we hoped. The landscape looks different as you get higher. The houses that seemed so big shrink down, the sky gets bigger, and landmarks begin to stand out. You get a better sense of how things fit together and where each should be.


When God calls us to come up higher, we shift out of our point-of-view into God's perspective. This is a place where self-righteousness fades away and we can see our own actions for what they really are. The great news is that with God there is always mercy. The call to come up higher shows us where we fit into God's big picture, chosen and important but not Lord over all we survey!


Dwelling

I thought that during Lent I would try and write a short blog with a photo from that day each day, so here goes...

At the moment I am looking to buy a new house. It is strange the emotions that it stirs up as you think about leaving an old way of life behind and try and imagine what your new life will look like in different houses.

Dwelling is a funny word, it is where you live, where you have your home, where you are settled; but it is also something you do, you mull over, think about, linger on.


I read Psalm 27 this morning. Verse 4 says:

One thing have I asked of the LORD,
that will I seek after:
that I may dwell in the house of the LORD
all the days of my life,
to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD
and to meditate in his temple.

A new house means a new dwelling place with God, to make my home with Him afresh, to dwell on what it means to be in His presence. Somehow that makes the process seem a little less daunting.

One day God planted a stake in the ground

God spoke
        Darkness came
                        God was there

God spoke
        Light came
                        God was there

God spoke
        Creation overflowed
                        God was there

One day God planted a stake in the ground

"Everything I have is yours
    - share it with me or use it for yourselves"

They ate
         A different light came
         They were hidden from each other
                          But God was there

"Everything I have is mine"
    - but still a voice within whispers of a different way

One day God planted a stake in the ground

"This is my body given for you"
    - a gate or a stumbling block

Take, eat
          Their eyes were opened
                           And God was there

"Lord, it's hard to give my body to serve you"
    - but the Spirit comes and brings strength within

Still....

Sometimes when we speak
           Darkness comes
                           God be there

Sometimes when we speak
            Light comes
                            God is there

Lord help us speak
            "Your kingdom come"
                             God is here

Barrier breaking power

At the moment I am in Israel. It is a tense time with hundreds of rockets being fired by Hamas into Israel and by Israel into Gaza. I am fortunate to be some way away, but I am right on the border between Israel and the West Bank, just north of Bethlehem. When I arrived here and looked out of the window, the first thing I saw was a wall. A huge barrier more than twice my height, stretching as far as my eye could see, crowding up against the houses of Bethlehem. And it shocked me. Even now 12 days later when I see it my stomach kind of churns.

 

I have learnt a lot in the short time I have been here, talking to Palestinian Christians and Muslims, Israeli Jews and non-Jews. And have certainly learnt enough to know that there are no easy answers to an issue that has thousands of years of layers to burrow down through. What I am more and more convinced about though as I listen and pray is that the barrier breaking power seen in Jesus’ life, death and resurrection is the most relevant thing that I can cry out for.

In Ephesians 2.13-17, we read what Paul has to say to the Gentile Christians: “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far off have been brought near by the blood of Christ. For he is our peace, and in his flesh he has made both groups into one and has broken down the dividing wall, that is, the hostility between us. He has abolished the law with its commandments and ordinances, that he might create in himself one new humanity in place of the two, thus making peace, and might reconcile both groups to God in one body through the cross, thus putting to death that hostility through it.”

There is a visible dividing wall running through this land whose physicality is an in-your-face symbol of deeper emotional, psychological and spiritual realities. The gospel shows us that there is only one way to break down such a division and that is to relinquish our hold on all our human structures of power, security and defence, in a way that allows us not to retaliate when we are threatened. It seems impossible, but Jesus showed us it is not. This is the radical call of the gospel that is confronting me every day here. This is how divine reconciliation happens.

And I wonder, if a wall cut through my personal freedom and I lived with it week in, week out; if I never knew whether the next rocket would injury or kill me or someone I loved, would I be able to lay down my anger and frustration and urge to get even? I can’t answer from my privileged perspective, but I can pray for the courage for people here to seek peace, and hold out the hope that it is possible.